Kindred Spirit Lodge Presents
The Quest
Part 2 of 8
by Shasa Jin Umi & Nessa
March 30th, 2002
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(Shasa) --
Apollo had been fully materialized for a candlemark, and still Kirsa plodded slowly down the road. Morning dew kept dust from rising, and the cool of the air had chilled the tired mare. Shasa’s reeling thoughts had kept her from noticing.
It was an early morning traveler that brought her back, with a rousing, “Hullo!”
The call had startled Shasa so badly, she nearly drew her sword and soiled her leathers at the same time. She whirled towards the man and child, assessed them, and relaxed…slightly.
“Good morning.” Her voice, normally a deep and sensuous alto, rasped the greeting. She winced, rubbed her throat, and unlatched her water skin.
“Say, I don’t mean to meddle, but…uh…” The man slowed and stopped his speech, as piercing green eyes lanced through him. He unconsciously tightened his grip on his daughter’s hand, and seemed to be reconsidering the wisdom of his words.
Shasa saw the reaction and felt ashamed. She took a deep breath, gave herself a shake, and graced them with a smile. Her softened features were open and welcoming. A visible relief could be seen on the face of the stranger.
“I’m sorry for my reaction; you startled me. Can I help you?”
“Um, well, we were just starting out this morning, and saw you coming. We were gonna ask you if you had some water you could spare.”
Shasa noted the dripping water skins that he carried, and smiled. Then she laughed lightly and dismounted. She stretched sore muscles before walking to the pair.
The man took a step back and flinched.
Shasa held her palms out and tried to reassure him. “I truly am sorry. Please don’t be afraid. I won’t hurt you.” She gestured to the water skins. “But your water supply seems to be fine.” She grinned. “What was it you really wanted?”
He looked down at the child, and then returned her gaze. His free hand wiped nervously at his pants before rising to gesture at Kirsa. “Like I said before, I don’t mean to meddle…but your horse there looks ‘bout ready to keel over.”
Shasa’s eyes went wide, and she looked at the mare. Her heart sank. She had been so preoccupied with her own thoughts, she’d forgotten to wipe Kirsa down after their hard nights ride.
She turned back to the man, unable to meet his eyes, the shame and gratitude fighting for dominance over her features. “I…um…I guess I got lost in my own musings…and forgot her.” Shasa ran her fingers through her short hair, and then rubbed them over her face. The exhaustion clearly marked her.
The stranger kindly nodded, as if this was an acceptable excuse. “I thought you’d like to know that there’s a good sized lake ‘bout a mile or so through the woods there.” He gestured over his shoulder. “The path leads right to it. It’s a good place to stop, if you wanted to rest a bit.” His hands rested on the child’s shoulders. “Lara and I camped there last night.”
Shasa gratefully nodded. Her eyes had teared suddenly as weariness overcame her. “Thank you, sir.”
He nodded again, and then led his child away.
Shasa turned guilty eyes on Kirsa, and rebuked herself. She owed the man a great deal. Suddenly she turned towards the retreating couple and yelled, “Wait!” Shasa ran to catch up, then knelt in front of the girl.
“Hi honey. Lara, right?”
A shy, dimpled smile answered the warrior, and she hid her face against her father’s thigh. Shasa remained crouched, but turned her eyes upward and addressed the man. “Mind if I ask you where you’re headed?”
A broad smile accompanied his answer. “Amphipolis! Lara here wants to hear Gabrielle, the famous bard. Word is that her first performance is tonight—we won’t make that one—but she’ll be telling stories at the inn for 3 nights straight.”
Shasa turned back to Lara. “Really? That’s great! You’ll have a wonderful time.” She then looked at the child conspiratorially. “I’ve heard she tells stories in the mornings too, but only for the children that stay at the inn. No grown ups allowed.”
Large brown eyes peeked out in excitement. “Really?”
Shasa nodded emphatically. “Really.”
She tugged at her father’s britches. “Papa! Didja hear that?”
Shasa grinned and glanced up. The man’s eyes were distressed. Shasa smoothly intervened.
“He sure did, Lara. And I’ll bet he’s jealous that he can’t go to morning story time with you kids. Just look at his face!”
Lara giggled.
“But you’ll tell him about the stories he misses, won’t you?”
Lara’s head bobbed up and down vigorously.
“Good girl.” Shasa tweaked the button nose in front of her, and then slipped a hand into her hip pouch. “Lara? Sweetheart, I’ve gotta go now, but before I do, would you like to feed this carrot to my horse?”
Lara took the carrot and looked to her father for permission. He nodded, and she ran off.
Shasa stood and looked the exasperated man in the eyes.
“Lady, I don’t have the money for a room at the inn! Whadja go and raise her hopes like that for?”
Shasa smiled and pushed a bulging coin purse into his hand. “Because I pay my debts.”
The man’s eyes nearly popped out of his head, and he began to sputter protests. Shasa waved them away.
“You both deserve it, and I can afford it.”
Whatever response he had in the works was swallowed up by the child’s return. Lara ran up giggling and chattering away about how the horsie’s lips tickled her.
Shasa laughed and tousled the girl’s hair. “Maybe you’ll see her again in Amphipolis. I’m going there too! You’ll keep an eye out for us, won’t you?”
Lara declared she would, then began to spin in circles.
The man sighed and shrugged, then clasped Shasa’s arm. “Thanks.”
Shasa pinned him with serious eyes, and nodded towards the dizzy child sitting in a heap on the ground. “Enjoy your time together; it all ends too soon.”
******
Where the Hades was Meika?
Shasa sat on a felled log facing the clear lake, head held in her hands. Her clean, wet hair fell into her eyes, and she glared at the irritating strands. This caused a comical crossing of the eyes, which would have instigated gales of laughter, had anyone been around to notice.
But she was very much alone.
Shasa sighed.
Meika was free to come and go as she pleased; therefore, her absence wasn’t the cause of Shasa’s distress. Instead, it was her own realization that she had no idea when the yellow Lab had ventured off. The longer she thought about it, the more she realized that she hadn’t seen Meika at all since they left the stable in Neapolis.
Shasa had failed to notice Kirsa’s needs since that time, so why was she surprised to find that Meika had tired of the distracted human? She closed her eyes. The answer was simple. She wasn’t surprised at all. She was sad. Sad that she seemed to be failing those she loved the most.
Shasa stood and returned to the gear she had placed under a nearby tree.
Curling up on her side, she hugged herself tightly, trying to ease the emptiness she felt in her heart. Tears welled behind closed lids, seeking avenues of escape, and Shasa found herself wishing Nessa was there to wrap her in strong, comforting arms. The words of the sad Celtic love song floated through her mind, and her body began to unconsciously rock itself, as she drifted off.
(Shasa)
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(Nessa) --
Birdcalls and rustling leaves were the only sounds that were constant as Nessa and Tuttle plodded through the winding mountain trail. The breeze was perfect for keeping the heat of the sun at bay on this fine spring day. It might have been a pleasant trek if Nessa didn't feel a sense of urgency to find Shasa.
Sitting back in the saddle, giving Tuttle rein, Nessa sifted through memories. She realized that she was going after her friend now for the same reason she left her in the first place. Shasa was driven by a need for vengeance that never ceased to plague the lass and never allowed the relationship between the two women to flourish as it might have.
It is not that Nessa didn't understand that drive for vengeance. Shasa was scarred and left briste (broken) from not just her father's death, but also the hideous manner of that death. The endless nightmares that plagued the young sailor became nearly as familiar to the Celt as they were to Shasa. Nessa often held the girl close just to keep her from flailing about in her sleep and hurting herself. Sometimes she looked at green eyes that held blank terror until Shasa was fully awake.
There were plenty of fond memories too. These served to remind Nessa of why Shasa was such an important part of her life and certainly worth keeping there. Shasa did, after all, save the Warrior's life then satisfied the wild dark lust of the lord in a way that was special to Shasa alone. Feelings began to stir in her as she thought about the precious slut.
*******
Nessa thought after that first time in Shasa's bed, that that would be the end of it and they would part ways mutually satisfied. Nessa recalled with a smile that she was definitely in need of further satisfaction from the lass. It was a beginning rather than an end.
Within a fortnight of their parting, they met again on the trail. Both were traveling in the same direction. They more than liked each other's company and decided to continue together. That is when Nessa learned of Shasa's quest to find the beast that murdered her father and half the crew while she was off to do her father's business. Her return to the ship and what she found there changed her. It turned her natural brightness down to a flicker. It gave her a dark purpose, which was all she had to help her regain her shattered self.
They came to one village after another searching for the bloody warlord. Always, they were just one village away, no matter how fast they traveled. Clues were hot then cold. Nessa watched it wear on the lass as the obsession grew. That was the wedge that came between them. Nessa had her fill of hatred and killing. She was battle worn and healing from some inner wounds of her own. The constant search for that unsatisfied vengeance cast a shadow on her healing.
Their parting was sad but understood by each of them to be a necessary action. The Celt knew she would always love Shasa. Shasa knew it too. These were the thoughts that churned in Nessa as darkness descended on the mountainside. She made camp, brushed her sweet mare down, ate a small supper and slept. Determination to find her friend, deepened with each passing hour.
(Nessa)
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(Shasa) --
“Do you really want to let that pirate bitch get away with doing this to me?”
Shasa looked away from her father’s piercing stare and looked into the fireplace. “No, Sgiobair, of course not. She should pay for her crimes.”
“With her life, child! I’ll accept no less from ye!” he bellowed.
Shasa fumbled with her clothing, and avoided a response.
She started to speak, then stopped. Then sighed and started again, careful to keep her eyes averted. “Marishta seems to have forgiven her and moved on…maybe we could do the same?”
“Forgive her! Forgive HER? Have you lost your wits, Shasa? How can ye consider such a thing?”
Shasa stammered as her heart pounded in her chest. “Xena seems to…to have changed her life around, and…and from every report I’ve heard for years…she’s been fighting on the side of good…”
“I CANNOT believe my very ears!” The Captain paced around the room in a fully restored body. “Are ye the same daughter that I proudly took to my side as first mate?”
“Yes, Sgiobair!” Shasa was near tears, as the one she loved berated her.
“The very same daughter to whom I entrusted with my name, my honor, my crest?”
Shasa’s palms closed protectively on her temples, and pressed in—a futile attempt to stop the whirling activity in her mind and maintain her sanity.
“LOOK AT ME, SHASA!”
Frightened green eyes looked quickly up to link with a mirror image of color and intensity. Yet the eyes of her loving father were filled with anger and reproach. Tears filled Shasa’s eyes, and spilled over. She lowered her head in shame.
Several silent moments passed before large hands pulled her gently to a strong and solid body, enfolding her in warmth and tenderness. “I’m sorry, lass. I’ve done nothing but yell at ye lately, haven’t I? It’s a disgrace for me to act so callously with the one I love so. Ye are my child, and I know that you’ll honor me when the time comes. You’ve never let me down. I trust ye, as I always have.”
“Father, it’s so hard to know what’s right anymore.” Shasa sobbed into the shirt of the large man.
“Trust me, child.” He stroked the red head affectionately.
“I do, Father, but…” Shasa broke down in gales of tears.
“What is it, Shasa?” He whispered.
“I’ve…I’ve lost so much!” Shasa cried.
“I know child. I lost ye as well.”
“No! Not just you and momma!” Shasa felt her anger rise, and she pulled back and looked in her father’s eyes. “I’ve lost the last ten years of my life! I’ve lost friends, and opportunities, and… Nessa…by the gods, father! I lost Nessa because I was chasing a reformed pirate around the damned world! For you!”
Sgiobair closed his eyes and took a deep breath, and for a moment, Shasa feared she had again woken the rage that had finally quieted within him. But when the stunning eyes fell upon her, they held sadness.
“Shasa, you truly have lost much. You’re not wrong to be angry. But your anger is misplaced. You’ve lost ten years. I’ve lost my life. You’ve lost your Nessa. I’ve lost my wife and child.”
Shasa lowered her head at his words, but he tenderly lifted her chin. “We’ve both lost a lot. But it wasn’t your Sgiobair that took these things. It was Xena.”
Warm lips pressed against her forehead. “If I could do it from the grave…make things right…I would. I’d bring Xena to justice myself, and save ye from feeling any more loss and pain. But I can’t, Shasa. It’s up to you.”
Silent tears streamed down Shasa’s face, and she nodded. “I understand. I just don’t know if I can do it, anymore.”
He didn’t try to hide his disappointment. Then he gave himself a shake, straightened his shoulders and smiled. It was a smile that brought back her Sgiobair, the man she remembered her father to be. Her heart soared to see him once again. He grasped her shoulders firmly. “There’s no doubt in my mind, Shasa. My trust is well placed.”
Kirsa kept watch over the suffering human as she slept. She never understood what made the human’s eyes leak, or why thrashing around was necessary for this human to sleep. But she found herself sorely wishing that Meika was with her…just in case.
(Shasa)
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(Nessa) --
Movement woke her just before dawn. Nessa had a grip on her sword handle, as she lay curled in her bedroll. Sleep left her like a feather whisked up by the wind. Every sense was sharp within her. Again she heard it. It was a rustling, searching sound. Suddenly the Celt was on her feet.
The gleaming sword slashed through the air only to stop short. The possum lay still at the threat. But Nessa was no threat. She hated possum meat. She thought it greasy and strong tasting. She kicked the offensive rodent into the brush where it scrambled to gain footing and run. The damage to her pack where the little beast rummaged was minimal. The sweetbread she got from the Lodge kitchen was gone but it was due to be stale by today anyway.
Nessa brought the water skin to her lips. She drank deep swallows of it. This would be a hot day. She decided to get started. She could tell that Shasa's pace was erratic and nearly desperate. The trail the sailor left was telling. Nessa knew her friend would not be able to keep it up. She would have to rest and that would be Nessa's time to catch up.
Several days passed since Shasa left the Lodge. Nessa wondered if the driven lass had slept at all. If she had, there would be no peaceful slumber for the tormented Shasa. Camp broken and Nessa now in the saddle, she headed for the trail to Neapolis. Her thoughts went back to better and worse times. 'Shasa' she thought, 'you are hell bent and blind. This need for vengeance is no longer even your own need. I fear it will destroy you.'
Sweeter thoughts of the lass filtered in. Oh how that little slut could challenge the lord. She could spend hours on the trail teasing and tempting Nessa until the Celt relented and released her wild nature. Shasa never went unsatisfied. Nessa pulled in a breath at these memories. She knew if she kept it up she would be riding wet in the saddle before the sun was at it's highest. But keep it up she did.
They were camped outside a village where they heard the warlord was staying. Shasa must have been anxious. She talked constantly that day. Everything she did seemed to have an edge to it. Nessa was quiet. Not because she had nothing to say but rather because she didn't have a chance. Shasa noticed and began a kind of picking at the lord. She insulted and made reference to the leather phallus Nessa wore, harnessed to her firmly.
Over and over the lass would make some derogatory remark and then bat her eyes and gesture as lewdly as a whore. Back and forth it went until Nessa's temper woke up. She stood up from the log she sat on and crossed the camp in three strides. Shasa was off guard. But even if she had been ready, it would not have mattered. The Celt was now too dangerous to goad one more inch.
Grabbing a fistful of reddish brown hair, Nessa pulled Shasa to her feet from where she sat. She leaned down until her face was nearly touching Shasa's. She hissed through clenched teeth. "Ye stubborn, ungrateful, ill-mannered bitch! I'll be teaching' you how to talk to me!" What used to be a nice linen shirt became a rag with the swift rending from Nessa's hand, leaving the girl bare to the waist. Still holding the stricken and struggling Shasa by her hair, Nessa slapped those pretty breasts again and again. Hearing the wailing pleas to stop spurred her on.
Finally the lord stopped slapping. She squeezed each swollen breast. "Now you will speak to me properly lass" She looked down into remorseful green eyes. "Tell me that you love me." Nessa squeezed and pinched while Shasa writhed at the painful handling. "Say it slut." Her voice was surprisingly tender.
"I... love you N... essa" Shasa managed through her sobs.
Nessa let go of Shasa's hair. The girl’s hands flew up to ward off the slap that sent her reeling. She landed frighteningly close to the fire. She scrambled to her feet but Nessa was there. "Take those fucking pants off now!" bellowed the warrior. Shasa shaking, complied. She dared not resist the strident animal that was thundering in Nessa.
Nessa pulled Shasa by an arm to where Tuttle's saddle lay on the ground. She hauled her over it face down. The girl's pretty ass was high. "You better fucking stay across that saddle. You don't want to deal with me if you move away from it!" Leather slipped through loops.
There was no hope for Shasa's sweet ass. Down it came. The doubled up belt landed hard. There was no thinking, only pain. Now she was crying out with each solid, flat impact of the belt. She was also moving her adorably welting ass provocatively, helplessly. The crying, the animal screams hurt her pride as much as the flying belt hurt her ass. When Nessa finished the whipping, Shasa hung her head, weeping, sobbing and sweating.
Nessa's big hands lifted the swollen masses of Shasa's buttocks. "Say that you are sorry."
"I... I am sorry." Shasa was blubbering. She hated and loved this defeat.
The warrior pushed a finger into the tiny asshole. She thrilled to see the girl jump and renew her struggles. "Say you want me."
"I want you!" Shasa screamed.
"To do what slut?"
Shasa surrendered. "To fuck my ass Nessa."
"Oh yes lass. I will fuck your ass. I will fuck it with the leather cock you think is so funny. Is that right lass?" Nessa had her arms around Shasa's waist now. The phallus pressed against that sweet rosebud. Nessa listened while the girl whimpered in resistance one last time. "Is that right lass?"
Shasa just wanted it now. The slickness all up and down her ass crack and dripping from her cunt told of how she wanted it. "Yes!"
Nessa rammed into the screaming girl with a mighty thrust. Her fingers found the juicy clit and pressed. She groaned and rocked into Shasa. Screams went to cries and cries to moans. They came together in ear ringing intensity, each yelling out praise to the gods that made them.
Nessa felt the smile broaden her face as she remembered how sweet her Shasa became after that. It was at least a full week before she tested the warrior again.
(Nessa)
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(Shasa) --
“Why do I push you so hard?” Shasa whispered. The hard body beneath the slut was soft in all the right places, and she snuggled into the warmth. “I didn’t used to be so…contrary. Seems I fight you just to fight.”
The warrior’s gray eyes pulled away from stargazing to look briefly at the top of the head of the now docile woman in her arms. “Grief…anger…vengeance especially…has a way of changing a person. Not usually for the better.”
Shasa sighed, feeling the truth of the Celt’s words. “I don’t think I like what I’ve become, Ness.”
The lord realized she was holding her breath, and exhaled heavily. Shasa took that moment to slide her body on top of the warrior’s and burrow deeply into the available flesh. Nessa’s arms closed automatically around the slut, drawing her even closer. Shasa released a pleasant moan.
Nessa weighed the pros and cons, then mentally shrugged and said what was on her mind. “You could give up the search.”
Shasa stiffened, then pulled her head up from its comfortable cushion of warrior breast, and looked into the gray eyes. “I can’t, Ness. I feel…” Shasa suddenly stopped speaking. The wheels of thought nearly visible to the Celt. Then she shook her head. “I was going to say I felt a responsibility to bring the pirate to justice, but I realize that isn’t it. Part of me wants her to pay, but a bigger part needs her to know what she’s done, to understand it, and to feel bad. Maybe to see how wrong she was, and how many lives she’s destroyed.” Shasa snorted in disgust. “Gods, Ness, I want her to apologize. How unrealistic is that?”
The slut propped her chin up on her fist, and became lost in thought. “She’s the essence of evil.” Her hands absently traced circular patterns on the chest of her friend.
Nessa’s vision again was filled with starlight, and she digested the new information. “Tracking and chasing a criminal across the lands to bring her to justice is possible; it could even be healing if you saw genuine remorse.”
The warrior turned her eyes on full lips that were being worried between perfect teeth. She smiled sadly and cupped the cheek above her, capturing the slut’s attention. “But chasing evil itself? Evil feels no guilt or shame, lass. It would not repent or apologize. Evil simply is, Shasa. You’ll not find peace in this quest, if what you seek is the impossible.”
Nessa felt the full force of the piercing green eyes, as Shasa absorbed her words. The window to the young sailor’s heart was open, and she caught a brief glimpse of a lost and panicked child before the green eyes blinked and looked away. The Celt’s brow furrowed.
“I’ve gotta go get some more firewood or something.” Shasa squirmed out from under the heavy furs and began to dress quickly. When finished, she turned and slammed into an unmovable, naked warrior.
Shasa’s heart pounded in her chest, as she took in the concerned face of her lover. She averted her eyes and stepped around Nessa, but was stopped with a strong and gentle hand.
Shasa looked over her shoulder when the hand did not release her. “What do you want from me?”
Gray eyes searched her face. “I want you to be happy, Shasa.”
Shasa swallowed hard, and fought the tears that sprang to her eyes.
Nessa pressed on, kindness in her voice and touch. “Help me to understand, Caraid. Why can’t you leave this evil in your past and move forward?”
Shasa felt her heart breaking into a million pieces. She set her jaw, shrugged off the hand, and bitterly replied. “Move forward to what, Nessa? My life is gone. This is my life now; it’s who I am. This quest, as you call it, is all I have left.”
The warrior watched the sailor walk away, and then called out to her. “What happens after you bring the pirate to justice?”
“I’ll finally have peace, Ness.”
“You’ll not magically find peace, Shasa!”
Shasa stopped and turned with the strangest look on her face. There was no confusion, doubt, or fear. Grief and pain had also disappeared. A look of quiet confidence and calm acceptance had taken their place.
The sailor smiled at her with love and gratitude.
The Celt’s heart stopped. She was beautiful.
Shasa gazed at her Ness with lowered defenses, and allowed her love to flow through her. Then with a feeling of regret that surprised even her, she turned and disappeared into the woods.
Nessa returned to the warmth of her bedroll, mystified at the change that had come over the slut. She had come to trust her instincts, and something about Shasa’s words churned in her belly. But insight evaded her, and weariness came calling. They would discuss it again in the morning.
However, the peace of sleep continued to elude the warrior’s agitated thoughts. And that very fact brought about the dawn of her understanding.
Shasa’s plan was simple. Her confrontation with evil would end with her mind and spirit finally at peace, because she didn’t intend to survive.
(Shasa)
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