Kindred Spirit Lodge Presents

Here, In The Darkness
 

by Lady Alison & Nessa
April 3rd~9th, 2002

____****____

Alison paced, stopped, paced and stopped until She thought She would explode. Inside, where no one saw, She was in chaos. Her soul was not quiet and it disturbed Her greatly. She had to get out, had to get away, had to find peace in Herself before what passed as Her mind dissolved. She threw open the door and made Her way from the Lodge, She couldn't stand the walls, they were closing in on Her, pressing against Her, threatening to destroy Her.

She was tired, so tired of always trying to be the sweet gentle warrior everyone thought Her to be, including Herself. Right now, She felt none of those things. Right now, She wanted to lash out, to rip apart, to let loose the rage She felt boiling up inside.

She made Her way to the falls She and Her pet found, to the cave behind them and stalked far back inside, back where it was dark, back where She couldn't be seen by those who may pass by. It was cold and damp and dark and matched what She felt perfectly. Here, She was safe, here no one wanted anything from Her, here, She couldn't hurt anyone or disappoint anyone. Here, in the safety of the dark gloom Her sisters were spared this side of Her, Her pet was safe, Her tiny one safe, Her old friends safe and that was all that mattered to Her at the moment.

Part of Her prayed for an enemy, any enemy, She would rip them to shreds with Her bare hands and take great delight in the blood that would flow through Her fingers. Part of Her was scared to the very depths of Her soul because She felt that way. Such chaos had not been in Her for many ages, Her normally at peace soul was twisted in torment that threatened to cause Her to implode. She knew right now She could give the darkest warriors lessons on brutality and inflicting pain. This disturbed Her more than She could give voice to.

Here, in the darkness She was safe and so were those She loved. Here, She would remain until the storm in Her soul ceased to rage.

____****____

Sleep came finally, transporting Her back. Back to when the rage first began. Sometimes sleep was not a time of peace and sweetness, sometimes it unleashed the demons lurking inside the mind and heart.

*******

Her life in France was not an easy one. Truth be told, it was a wonder she survived it for 17 years. Life in the orphanage was hard, ruled by those who had very little care for their charges, beyond the work they could get out of them and the pleasures they could take from them. Take… there was no asking and definitely no refusal, to do so brought swift, sure and painful retribution.

Many of those who existed there with Her, did not have the strength to endure the almost daily beatings and nightly cruel takings that made up their world. Some died, some chose to remove themselves from the world rather than live through one more moment of torturous existence. Alison chose to leave, to flee and she paid a high price for doing so.

In the dead of night, one lone figure fled silently from the only existence she had known, not knowing what lay ahead, not caring. Passing through the gates of hell, would have been better than remaining in the wretchedness she came to call her life. She had nothing, save the clothes on her back, a small satchel of food and a dagger she was able to steal. Her lack of things did not matter. The real possibility that she might be caught and killed didn't matter. The only thing that mattered was escape. If that came in the form of death while fleeing, so be it.

She ran through the dark woods, her heart pounding in her ears, branches and brambles cutting into her flesh. She did not care. Each step took her farther away from the hell she knew lay behind her. She ran until her young legs gave out, and then she crawled into a small cave, just barely big enough for her. Exhaustion claimed her.

She awoke cold and shivering, but no one came for her in her sleep. She could not remember the last night no one came to use her. That one night, seemed like heaven, despite the aching in her body from sleeping on the hard floor of the cave.

She had no idea how far she had gone. She only knew it would never be far enough to suit her. She ate little, walked much and tried to leave the pain of that awful place behind. She walked all day, focused only on the path ahead, not noticing the woods around her, not caring about anything except getting farther and farther away.

*******

She strode on until night fell and once again settled for the night, this time under a large out-cropping of rocks. She should have continued till she found another cave but she was simply too tired to go on.

When she awoke, she was immediately aware that she was no longer alone. There, blocking her only route of escape, THEY stood, three of the ugliest, meanest looking men she had ever seen in her life.

"Well, well, boys look what we have here." The tallest of the three spoke as his eyes bore into her, chilling her to the bone. She tried to speak, but could not get her mouth to form anything but a pitiful whimper. She saw that look before, in different eyes, but the look was the same. All she wanted was to die.

Two of them reached in and pulled her to her feet, holding her there… her knees would have buckled otherwise. Their laughter sent waves of fear rushing through her. The man, who had spoken, ripped the rags she called clothing from her body in one move, leaving her to stand naked and trembling. She started to protest and it was met with a vicious backhand across her face, she felt her bottom lip split from it and tears filled her eyes. THEY laughed.

"Time for some fun boys. Hold her down."

THEY threw her to the ground, rocks digging into her back, each taking an arm, as the leader freed himself from his pants, roughly parted her legs, and savagely thrust into her again and again. She fought as best she could and all it got her was punched in the face over and over. Still, she fought until No more fight was left in her.

She felt each vicious thrust, felt the rocks tearing into her back. She didn't move when they changed places, each taking his turn ripping her apart.

******

When each man was finished, the leader grabbed her, flipped her over and slammed his large member into her virginal ass. She screamed, THEY laughed and she just knew this was where she was going to die. She had never known such pain, could feel her blood running down her legs and god help her, she longed for the orphanage. She didn't know how long the assault continued. To her, it was an eternity. Thankfully, at last, she passed out.

She came to with a violent kick to her ribs. She heard and felt them break and cried out in pain. THEY laughed. She tried to move and couldn't. She was staked spread-eagle upon the ground. One eye was swollen completely shut, the other barely letting in light. She hurt from head to toe.

Each breath caused searing pain in her chest. She had to breathe through her mouth. THEY broke her nose with their fists. To add insult to injury, THEY relieved themselves on her, and then the leader kicked her viciously in the head. Then darkness descended to claim her once more.

She screamed when she felt hands touch her. She was afraid THEY had returned. Both eyes were now swollen completely shut, leaving her in blindness.

"Shhh, child, you are safe now. I will not harm you, you have my word." The voice was soft and that of a woman. It calmed her.

She felt her arms and legs being freed. She was lifted and carried away from that place. The lady tended her, gently washing away the dirt, the grime and the foul stench of those who had done this to her. That soft voice spoke to her, soothing her and assuring her she would never be harmed again.

******

Alison woke with a start. Hot tears flowed down Her face. Her whole body shook as the remnants of the dream held Her in its grasp. "Oh Muen, Lady of My heart, I miss you more now than ever." She let the rush of grief pour through Her. She feared She would never stop crying.

____****____

Alison, sat huddled against the wall of the cave, shaking, arms around Herself, as memories of Lady Muen flooded though Her.

*******

Gentle, unseen hands tended her broken abused body, touching her so tenderly. Soothing words tended to her broken spirit. Alison did not know who this woman was but knew deep inside she was safe in her care. When the nightmares came, and god did they come, it was her voice that brought Alison out of them and her arms that held her gently until the trembling subsided.

Over and over, Alison awoke screaming and over and over the lady was right there by her side, whispering softly to her.

"Shhhh child. It is over. They cannot harm you anymore. I will not let them. You are safe child. I will let nothing hurt you. Rest little one, rest and grow strong." The voice was so soft and soothing. It calmed Alison and made her feel a way she never felt before. The lady's voice made her feel safe.

It didn't matter when the dreams came, the voice was always there. The arms were always around her. The pain in her body made her cry out. The lady was there, administering a vile tasting liquid that served to detach her from the pain.

It was still there, but the lady did her best to keep it at a distance, did her best to make it not hurt so bad and Alison was grateful, though to be honest she never tasted anything so nasty in her life. It made her sleep until THEY returned, and when THEY did, the voice, the hands, the arms were there to banish them from her.

Alison longed to be able to just open her eyes, yet they were so swollen, it would be days before she could even begin to contemplate that. She longed to just be able to look upon the lady who had rescued her, who tended her, who chased away the demons when they descended upon her. Alison never wanted anything as much as she wanted the simple act of Seeing the lady whose voice and hands soothed and calmed her. For now all she could do, was hoarsely whisper thank you.

******

Alison actually felt a small smile upon Her lips as Muen's standard reply came to mind. "Do not let them win little one and that will be all the thanks I need."

Alison fought now as she fought then, with everything in Her. She would not allow the demons of Her soul to win.

"Yes, little one fight as you did then."

Alison's head spun round so fast she heard the bones popping, it couldn't be, it was not possible but there before her stood Lady Muen. "Ho..how...how...I don't understand."

____****____

"Yes, little one fight as you did then."

Alison's head spun round so fast she heard the bones popping, it couldn't be, it was not possible but there before her stood Lady Muen. "Ho.How...how...I don't understand."

"Hush child, for my time here is limited. It was only my body that died little one; my love and caring of you will always remain. Even in death, I feel you battling those old demons inside of you. Still, after all these years, you remain a stubborn and prideful child. Do you really think you are protecting them or are you just afraid little one?"

The apparition was clearly Lady Muen, yet different, ethereal and emitting a soft, warm glow. She was even more beautiful than she had been in life. The sight of her sent fresh waves of grieving through Alison.

"My Lady, I am afraid of nothing, save that which is in me now." Ghost or not, Alison could tell Muen did not believe her.

"You can lie to yourself, little one, but I know better. You are afraid for those whom you love to see you in any kind of pain, you always have been. To you, to show that pain is to appear weak. You think it somehow lessens you in their eyes, because it does in your own. It has always been your nature to isolate when you need love and support the most. Will you never learn little one?" Muen's tone was gentle, yet Alison knew she was being taken to task, Muen style.

"Look, I have people depending on me now, those I have to be strong for. I also have a very tender gentle submissive who I do not wish to subject to my demons."

"You having a sub does not surprise me little one. You were, after all, well trained. Is it not better she should see you fight and win, than to be alone while you struggle here in this place? Is it not better for all of those you love to feel that they have your trust and faith in their ability to hold you up when you fall? Did I not let you see the things I went through? Did you also not learn from them?" Muen was standing so close that the light she gave off surrounded Alison.

For the first time since she entered the cave, Alison was warm. "My Lady you know how I hate it when you throw such questions at me. Yes, I learned from watching you, you taught me everything and you know it. You saved my life and put me back together and loved me long and well. You handled everything with a grace and dignity I just do not think I possess. I fear lashing out at them, letting the anger and hurt inside spill out onto them." Tears once more ran down Alison's face, she simply could not allow herself to risk putting her sisters in the path of her personal demons.

Muen smiled, "Little one, I must go but before I do I ask you this. Do you not think that these brave women are strong enough to withstand anything you could dish out? One is coming to find you and she will not take no for an answer. You would be wise to use the time to seriously look in your heart and see if what you fear is not what you have always feared, appearing weak to yourself." Muen began to shimmer and slowly fade, "Remember little one, even in death my love for you remains."

Tears streaming down her face Alison watched as the lady of her heart disappeared. "As mine always remains with you." Alison was sure her heart would shatter into a million pieces. Waves of raw emotion crashed over her. The tears flowed until once again, blessed sleep descended to embrace her.

____****____

The healing of her body was easy compared to the healing of the spirit inside of her. The years of abuse at the orphanage, the rape and beating when she left had combined to make her very distrustful, very wary of anyone...anyone except the Lady Muen. From the moment Alison finally laid eyes on the lady she trusted her; actually she had trusted her before that.

Almond shaped, emerald green eyes held Alison's deep brown ones, as they sat together by the water's edge. Each day, since Alison healed enough to be out of bed, Lady Muen and she took the short walk down to this place. It was peaceful and quiet, surrounded on three sides by deep woods. It was, according to Muen, her source of peace. This was where they talked, where Alison released the anger and pain inside, with only Muen to share it.

"Tell me little one, what is it you wish to happen?"

"What do I wish? I'll tell you what I wish. I wish to watch them all die, horribly, painfully, and slowly, that is what I wish. And one day I will see it happen. I will make them pay for what they did!" Alison spat the words as if they were acid upon her lips. Hatred and white hot anger filling her and spilling out from every pore.

"Ahhh, so it is revenge you seek child. Will it make you whole again, little one?"

"I do not know what it is to be whole. I have never been whole and probably never will be. So your question is moot. It will make me feel better to watch the skin flayed from the bastards, to castrate them and then make them watch as I grind their nuts into the ground. Will make me feel better to rip the cocks from them, with my bare hands and toss them in the fire. Their screams would go a long way towards making me feel better." Alison hated the way she felt inside and only the hideous death of those who hurt her could make it go away.

Muen took Alison's chin softly in her hand and held it tenderly, "Sweet child, I know they hurt you, I know they hurt you deeply, but this pain you carry inside only allows them to continue hurting you. They will end up winning if you allow hatred to fill your soul. It would sadden me greatly to see that happen." Muen then placed a small, tender kiss on Alison's lips and removed her hand.

Alison did not ever wish to cause this lady sadness and deep in her heart she knew Muen was right. Her hatred did not bother those who hurt her one bit, but damn sure made her feel sick inside. At Muen's kiss, tears filled Alison's eyes. Barely able to speak, Alison whispered, "I Can't let them win My Lady, I just can't."

Muen smiled softly, wrapped her arms around Alison and held her tight as the tears finally spilled from her eyes. She had grown to love and need this one as she had cared for her. Little did Alison know, but she awakened a part of Muen that she thought long dead. Together they would get through this, and together they would grow.

In the safety of Muen's embrace, Alison let go. She let the pain and anger flood through her. Each tear, each wracking sob served to heal a small part of her. She clung to Muen as if her life depended on it, and in many ways, it did.

"Yes, little one, let it all go, all the hatred, all the pain, just let it go. I am here and you are safe. Together we will not let them win ever again."

******

Alison awoke. Her face was wet with tears. She missed Muen as intensely as she had in the early days following Muen's death. Even in death, Muen was teaching her, training her, helping her heal.

____****____

Dreams of Muen opened up the floodgates of the past inside Alison and memories of their time together came rushing forth, threatening to sweep her away in the tide of grief and longing that followed. Many years had passed since Alison allowed herself to feel those memories, doing so always brought pain and longing. This time though, Alison did not stop them from coming, instead she let them wash over her.

*******

It had taken weeks for her body to heal and through it all Muen had been there, right by her side. She had shown Alison around, introduced her to many people and made it clear that no one was to touch her without Alison's consent, to do so would bring swift punishment from Lady Muen.

It took Alison a little while to realize just what Muen was. She was a Domme and ran this place, this house of pleasure, this sanctuary of healing. All those Alison encountered felt only love and respect for Lady Muen. It was evident in the way they spoke to her, about her and in the way they looked at her. No one treated Alison with anything but care and it touched her deeply. It was not something she was accustomed to, but she took it all in. Doing this served to help heal her inside.

Muen woke Alison early one morning. "Come with me little one, I wish to go somewhere with you." Muen's eyes held something Alison had not seen before. She couldn't tell exactly what it was, but somehow knew this day would hold something special for her.

"Always, my lady." Alison trusted Muen as she had never trusted another and would go anywhere with her. She rose and dressed. After they shared breakfast, Lady Muen held out her hand to Alison. When their hands touched Alison again felt things inside she didn't know how to describe, she just knew it felt wonderful.

Waiting outside was a powerful looking horse. Muen mounted then helped Alison up behind her. "Hold on my little one." An unexpected rush went through Alison when Muen called her that. It had always been child or little one but never MY little one. This did something to Alison.

*******

Alison wrapped her arms around Lady Muen's waist. She laid her head against the Lady’s back. She could hear Muen's heart beating. It felt wonderful to be so close to this woman who saved her life and soul. Muen stirred strange and unknown feelings in Alison.

They rode until the sun was high overhead and the day had grown quite warm. When Muen stopped, Alison found they were at an oasis, for it could not be called anything else. They were in a small clearing, facing a pool of crystal clear water into which a waterfall emptied. A canopy of tall trees above them, shading them from the blazing sun.

Muen dismounted then helped Alison down, the woman's arms went around Alison as she helped her dismount. "You are the only one I have ever brought here. I wanted to share this beauty with you." Muen's smile stirred those strange feelings inside of Alison.

Alison had never been anyplace so breathtakingly beautiful. She was in awe. It touched her that Muen had chosen to share it with her. "My Lady it is exquisite." They stood together for many moments just soaking it all in. Muen kept one arm around Alison's waist as they stood there. Never had being near someone felt so right, so good and yet so scary. A shiver ran through Alison.

*******

"What is it little one? Why do you tremble?" Muen's tone soft and gentle.

"I...you...you make me feel things, strange things, wonderful things that I never felt before my lady. I...I do not even know how to describe them." Alison had never been so tongue tied in her life.

"You make me feel things as well dear one. Things I have not felt in many years, things I never thought I would ever feel again. I want to ask you something. Have you ever been with a woman little one?"

The question caught Alison off guard and also stirred something inside her. "No my lady. I have never been with anyone willingly."

Muen turned Alison to face her, gentle hands holding her shoulders, "That makes me very sad my little one. It should never have been as it was. I promise it will never be that way again. I will let no one harm you. No one will take anything you are not willing to freely give."

"There is only one person I want to give anything to my Lady, that is you." The words rushed out of Alison's mouth before she realized it, but she knew them to be true.

Alison saw Lady Muen's beautiful eyes well with tears. She didn’t understand. "Oh god Muen, I…I didn't mean to say something wrong. Gods forgive me please."

Muen chuckled and pulled Alison into her arms. "My little one, you said nothing wrong… quite the opposite in fact. Don't you know I love you?"

Now Alison's eyes filled with tears. No one ever said that to her. She was so overcome all she could do was whisper, "I love you too." She clung to Muen tightly. She knew she found what she craved her whole life, someone who loved HER.

Muen tilted Alison's head up and kissed her, softly, slowly and deeply. "Let me show you how it is supposed to be my little one. Allow me to give to you. Please, let me love you."

*******

Never, had anyone ever asked her permission for anything, they simply took what they wanted with no regard for her desire. Alison did not have to think about her answer. She wanted this woman, needed this woman, and loved this woman. "Yes, My Lady, yes."

Muen kissed her again, taking her breath away. Muen showed her well into the night. Taking her as she had never been taken, giving to her, loving her completely. Alison accepted it all, let it erase the memory of so many others, let it fill her up and when her very first release ever crashed through her, it was Muen's name she screamed as tears flowed down her face and her body threatened to shake to pieces.

The night was filled with giving and taking, teaching and learning and sharing. Alison thought her soul would explode when she heard Muen cry out her name. From that night forward, they belonged to each other as neither had ever belonged to another. It was the first of many years of nights.

*******

Alison could do nothing except cry, part of her soul died with Muen. She would never be whole again.

____****____

(Xena (Nessa)

The morning was slightly crisp. Xena knew the chill would give way to a Spring warmth before the sun was high. She read this weather news in the red swirling clouds in the distance. Red sky, hot day. Cyrene taught her that before she ever tested it. But it always proved true.

Xena stood on the balcony off the chambers she shared with her bard. She loved this place. The Kindred were her kindred. She never really had a home base before. Now she did. Having this brought calm. The warrior was wrapped in these musings when she felt a presence.

"Xena"

It wasn't that her name was spoken that assured Xena that the source was no enemy. It was the sound of the voice that carried it. She turned slowly. There was the apparition of an old and dear friend. "Muen!" Xena grinned and stared at the beautiful glowing spirit. "What brings you to my balcony? You don't usually visit." She quipped.

"Don't think it isn't perfectly wonderful to see you just because I have another purpose old friend." Muen drifted close. "I need a favor Xena."

"Thought so" Xena said with a smirk. She remembered a time when she was wounded and running from a rival warlord. Muen took her in and kept her hidden while she healed. She risked much and asked little. Xena owed her. "I'll do what I can Muen. Tell me."

"It is Alison. She needs your help."

"Alison? Our Alison? The Alison who lives here?" Xena was trying to connect Muen with Alison. Her beautiful face reflected the puzzlement.

"She will explain our relationship to you at another time. Xena you must help her. She is precious to me." Muen explained and Xena listened. She told of Alison's current misery and how she ran when it looked like she would explode with the darkness of her past. She told of the walls the gentle warrior put up in the name of sparing others. She told Xena much about Alison. Then she told her just what was needed to help her. "You are the only one alive who can do this for my little one." Muen ended with a plea in her voice.

Xena stood in deep thought for a moment while the spirit of her friend waited. "Alright Muen. I will do as you ask. But I will want Gabrielle with me. It has to be that way."

"Of course Xena." Muen appeared relieved. She blew the warrior a kiss and floated back beyond the veil.

Xena watched the disappearance. Then she walked into the Chambers to find her partner.

*******

The two women wound into the cave slowly, holding to the walls. The waterfall was loud and hid any noise they might be making, but the splashing water and shade caused the entrance to be slick with moss. Once inside, they moved more easily. Xena held the torch against the darkness as they went.

"Listen Xena. Do you hear that?" Gabrielle was one of the best tracker's in the known world. She learned to use all her senses. Of course her teacher was the very best.

"Yes Brie. It is Alison. She is crying." Xena whispered. "Let's go."

They saw her. She was sitting on the cold floor of the cave with her head buried in arms folded around her knees. Xena walked slowly but wanted to let Alison know they were there. She held the torch high. "Alison" she whispered.

Alison's head pulled up fast. Her eyes were swollen from crying but she could see well enough to recognize Xena. "What do you want Xena? Isn't this valley big enough for us all to find separate caves?"

"Muen sent us." Xena spoke while Gabrielle started gathering kindling scattered around the cave.

Alison raised eyebrows in surprise. "Really? Did she tell you that I was ready to kick some warrior ass?"

Xena would have laughed if she didn't know the pain that drove the usually gentle warrior. "We are here to deliver a message."

"What message?"

"The message from Muen and all the Kindred, Alison." Xena spoke evenly. "You seem to think you are sparing us all by running away to a cold dark cave. But you see, You do not get to decide if I should be spared or Twilight or Killian. We have a say so in it. You took away our right to help you with your pain. You left us to worry and wait." Xena fit the torch in a pocket in the rock wall, just made for the purpose. "It seems that you don't know how we all love you. Muen told me what you need in order to learn that we love you."

Alison stood up fast. She understood what Muen told Xena to do. "Damn her!" She backed up as Xena advanced. "Wait Xena, I am not going to let you do this."

Xena smiled. "You are not going to stop me either." She grabbed Alison quickly. She pulled the small warrior in and wrapped her arms around her as she held her wrists. This gave Xena the advantage. Alison was probably weak from hunger and no rest. Xena lifted her. She carried the kicking woman to a ledge that Gabrielle pointed out. Perfect.

Xena draped Alison over her lap as she sat. She motioned to Gabrielle to pull the warriors britches down while she held her. "You will have a lesson now from Muen." Xena slapped down hard. "From me and Gabrielle." Again came the hand down on a pretty ass. "From Twilight." Again. "From Killian." Again. "From Klancy" Again. On and and on went the spanking. Xena named every Kindred in the Lodge.

Alison was doing her best to resist but soon gave in to the punishment as if it were the one cleansing thing in the world that could have mattered. Tears rolled. Alison wailed under Xena's harsh but loving hand. Finally she cried out "I'm Sorry! I'm so sorry I didn't trust you... all of you.!" It stopped.

The tall warrior pulled Alison up. She turned Alison and sat her sore ass down onto her lap. She put her arms around the sobbing woman and held her. Xena looked over at Gabrielle. The eye contact was electric. They had a plan. Gabrielle pulled a thick blanket from her pack. She spread it on the floor by the fire. She watched as her warrior carried the half naked Alison to her.

Alison just gave in. She went with the sensations these beloved were giving her. She felt her shirt removed. She lay flat on her back while Gabrielle plunged one of those gorgeous breasts in her mouth. Alison sucked on the bard as if she would never know this ecstasy again (and she probably wouldn't).

She felt her sore ass lifted. She was astonished to feel Xena's mouth on her sex. The tongue licked. It dove into her and licked again. Xena took Alison. Strong, long fingers probed and pushed into her, then out, then in. Soon it was a rhythm of movement between the three women.

Gabrielle managed to pull her breast away and move up to straddle Alison's face. There she rocked back and forth as Xena fucked their darling Alison. Moaning and wet plunging, sucking sounds filled the cave. Gabrielle came first. She let out a yell that rivaled Xena's war cry. Her beautiful body shuddered as she rocked on Alison's face.

Alison followed. She drove her wet sex up to meet strong hard thrusts. Her climax lifted her off the cave floor with it's force. She screamed out praises to her precious and not really lost, Lady Muen.

____****____

(Alison)

Together, the three of them lay there, arms about each other. Slowly, Alison told Xena and her bard all about her life with Muen. She told them about how Muen had found her, so broken and lost. She told how Muen tenderly cared for her and helped heal her soul as well as her body. She held nothing back from them. Tears streamed down her face. Her heart ached like it would burst from grief. She told them everything about those wonderful years Muen and she had been together. Alison actually smiled when she told them of one very special night.

******

Muen and Alison spent the day talking and making love at the falls. They went there often. It became their spot. Both cherished the time they spent there. They didn't always make love when they were there. But more often than not, the passion and desire between them overtook them both and nature took its course. Often the air was filled with moans and cries of abandon. This had been such a day. As they lay there, cuddled together Alison spied a rabbit watching them, like it was trying to figure out what sort of creature it was seeing. A smile crossed Alison's face as she looked from the rabbit to Muen.

"I swear my love that damn rabbit looks like he's trying to tell us something."

"Probably trying to tell us to knock it off, we're making him look bad." Muen's laughter brought a smile to Alison's face and soon they were both laughing. Alison swore the bunny just shook his head, decided they were hopeless and hopped on about his business.

After the laughter had stopped, Muen softly caressed Alison's face while looking deep into her eyes. "Tonight, My little one, is going to be a glorious night."

"Every night is a glorious night. What makes this one different?" Alison softly caressed Muen's skin as they lay there.

Muen had to smile, "You do have a point. But this night I plan on making it known to everyone that you belong to me and I to you. You have given me back my heart little one and I gladly give it to you. Tonight all will know that I love you." Muen's words were punctuated with the most tender of kisses bringing tears to Alison's eyes once again.

"You saved me when I would have surely died. You healed me inside and out. You taught me everything I know. You made me believe in myself and in another. This is something I never thought would happen. You are my heart Muen and I have belonged to you since before I could even see you. My heart, like the rest of me, is yours." Now the tender kiss came from Alison.

The only sounds were the sounds of them claiming each other again and again. After they regained use of their legs, Muen stood and helped Alison to her feet. "Come, my little one, we have guests arriving soon."

They returned to their rooms and took a long hot bath together and dressed for the evening. Muen wore a long flowing gown, the color of her eyes. Alison dressed in a similar gown of deepest purple. Both women looked exquisite. They descended the stairs hand in hand. They greeted those who were assembled to share this night with them. The kitchen staff truly outdid themselves. Dinner was a wondrous mixture of exotic and local dishes.

Muen, lead them all into the main parlor after dinner and when all were settled, pulled Alison to her side. "This night, my friends, is a most special occasion which I am honored to share with you all." She looked at Alison and smiled. "This night, Alison ceases to be a guest in my home. This night she ceases to be a lodger in my home." Taking Alison's hand in hers and looking deeply into her big brown bedroom eyes, Muen said, "This night, Alison becomes owner of my heart and soul… heir to everything I have. This night joy fills my soul. This night she becomes my wife and I hers."

Muen pulled two gold signet rings, bearing both their initials, from a small box. One she placed on Alison's pinkie, which she wore to this day. The other Muen placed on her own finger. "From this time forward, my little one, my wife, you will never be alone. You will never know a day without love or a night without passion. You will never fear for your safety again. Heart, mind, body and soul… I am yours. I love you."

Tears rolled down Alison's cheeks since Muen first started speaking. They were tears of joy and of love, which Alison proudly shed. "All that I am and ever will be is yours, beloved Muen. I am yours, heart, mind, body and soul and I love you more than mere words could ever express."

A collective ovation greeted them, as Muen took Alison in her arms and kissed her slowly and deeply. They could both feel the fire of their passion burning just under the surface, and as soon as decorum allowed, hand in hand they ascended the stairs and were not seen for three days, except by a member of the kitchen staff, who made sure they partook of food, as well as each other.

******

"I have never told anyone this Xena, the only one who knows about it is Ikarias. Muen was extremely fond of ole dragon butt, as I am. She shared the joy of that night with us." A smile shined through the tears, "Thank you, thank you both for letting me speak of her, of us. It has been hidden inside for too long."

"Yes, gentle warrior, it has. There will be no more running off and hiding, Alison. I will spank you until my hand falls off next time." Xena hugged her tightly.

"She would speak to me of you Xena. She used to tell me that the Warrior Princess was, quote, ‘definitely bed-able’ unquote. She thought you would have made an excellent addition to her staff." Alison gave Gabi a wink. "She was right."

"Of course, she was. Now, I think it's time we all returned to the lodge, don't you?" Xena rose and helped both Gabi and Alison to their feet. Then she set about extinguishing the fire Gabi built, making it known that her "request" was no request at all.

Thus ends Alison's journey into the darkness of self.

____****____


The End - by Alison & Nessa

Ally's Index

Main Library Stories

Lodge Entrance